In the last few days there has been a surge of allegations in the gaming and tech community accusing several high profile personalities of sexual improprieties. As is almost always the case, lines are going to be drawn, sides are going to form, and you are going to have people supporting the alleged victim one one side and the alleged perpetrator on the other.
The phrase "believe all women" is often thrown around in instances like this whenever a sexual accusation is made. I think the better phrase is "listen to women and take them seriously." Too long to be suited for a hashtag on social media, I know, but it's a phrase that I feel works so much better in accomplishing what we need to actually accomplish, and that's getting getting justice for anyone victim of sexual assault or harassment. "Believe all women" a phrase that I absolutely cannot stand, find it incredibly dangerous, and I wish people would be a little bit more rational before blindly throwing phrases around without knowing their implications and the harm they could potentially cause not just for the MeToo movement, but for others.
No person, for any reason should ever simply believe something just because. We, as a society, already operate under this model the far majority of the time in everyday life, however, for some reason that logic seems to have escaped us with regard to sexual allegations. Whenever we are told a piece of information of any kind, we first process the plausibility of that information. It's an innate mechanism that prevents human beings from being snookered and taken advantage of. Shutting off your own safeguards and your ability to evaluate any piece of information given to you and its legitimacy is willfully dumbing down your own intellect.
There is a perception out there that immediately believing a woman whenever a sexual allegation is made is good for the woman, therefore you are doing the right thing. I think those who believe this are legitimately trying to do the right thing, just going about it the wrong way. There is a major problem with sexual assault and harassment in this world. Women have not been taken seriously enough, and they need to be, so vile individuals no longer take advantage of these women and treat them like sex objects. Countless victims are still out there unheard and afraid to speak due to years of us failing them as a society. However, merely "believing" a woman accomplishes nothing. If you want to get justice for a woman done wrong, it's not about what you believe, it's about what you can prove. That's just how the justice system works. It starts with listening to women and taking their allegations seriously, which, may be a small difference, but an important one. Facts and plausibility are always what need to be believed. If a woman accuses a man of sexual assault, law enforcement needs to listen intently, get all the facts, do a thorough investigation and either successfully corroborate those claims or not. Now, whether or not enough evidence will be amassed to actually bring charges is another story, but "believing" someone's story has no affect on that outcome whatsoever.
The court of public opinion is obviously a completely different beast, but I think the same logic should apply. It doesn't matter what the public believes when claims of sexual improprieties are made. The public's belief operates independently from the reality of what actually occurred, so it will do nothing to bring forth justice that the alleged victim desires. It will, on the other hand, potentially cause a total shit storm for the accused if they are, in fact, innocent. In today's age of social media, public pressure is greater than ever. People will be hounded with thousands upon thousands of angry voices calling for justice from all around the world, when mere decades ago that number was limited to some angry letters, emails, and signs outside of buildings. Companies feel backlash, so for the sake of self-preservation decide to end careers over what amounts to only an accusation. It's a horrible precedent to set, and enables anyone out there who wants vengeance on an individual for whatever reason, that they can severely damage a person's livelihood with very little else besides mean social media messages as a punishment, if they decide that trade-off is worth it. Mindlessly believing someone without merit, throws shade on the legitimate victims, who then will unfairly be lumped into the pool of sex crimes victims with those who either made fictional or exaggerated claims. Seeing the vitriol false accusers get on social media from enraged users who feel betrayed for buying into their stories, could deter actual victims from coming forward to tell their stories out of fear that if they oddly word their stories, they will get piled on as well. False accusers poison the well for everyone. It's extremely dangerous, and the last thing we want as a society is victims to not feel comfortable about coming forward and speaking out.
Whether you want to accept this fact or not, not every person accused of an impropriety is guilty. Most rape and assault allegations are true, but there are some that aren't. They should not be ignored either. There are good people out there who are the victim of crazy, spiteful, vindictive individuals who just want to ruin lives, and we should not enable this simply because we don't have the patience to wait for all the facts to come out. You can pick a side you think is most plausible, while also acknowledging that you still don't know the facts. Yet, many people can't even do that, and parading around with "BELIEVE ALL WOMEN" phrases implies just that: you don't need the facts, they don't matter. I've seen people like Neil DeGrasse Tyson being called a sexual predator like it was a proven fact of life, before even hearing his side of the story and letting the investigations take their natural course. These people didn't need to hear the facts, they just decided he was accused, so he's guilty, and then it spreads like wildfire. Others see it, believe it to be true, because they are too lazy or ignorant to put the time and effort into researching the subject, and next thing you know half the internet thinks someone is Satan over what amounted to be very little information at that point. And if it turns out in the end that the accused is actually innocent, then their lives could potentially be severely damaged with no hope for reconstruction. No one offers redemption to those kicked to the curb for no good reason, they become yesterday's news, and society moves on to the next big story to latch onto.
It's happened to others. Johnny Depp, Chris Hardwick, Alec Holowka from the gaming industry. Alec Holowka committed suicide over these allegations, as it ruined relationships he had in the gaming industry. A sober reminder that there are human beings on the other side of this, and actions this severe, if illegitimate can have dire consequences. We, as a society, have gone too far on our course correction in trying to solve the problem of sexual misbehavior. We've turned off our brains and decided to blindly follow the herd on the path toward justice, when the only path that will bring justice is the path of logic, reason, and a sensible mind in pursuit of justice. In the end, it's the victims of sex crimes who suffer the most, because the more this becomes a trend, the more society will regress back into not taking sexual allegations as seriously as they need to be, and more innocent women will not get the justice they so desperately deserve.
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